I'm excited to share what happened to me over the weekend. I'll split up Saturday and Sunday into two posts, and I'll start with Saturday.
I went to the ballet school, fully expecting a normal two hour level six class. That's not what I got, however. The regular teacher for ballet six on Saturday afternoons was away at an event, so five and six were combined. One of my other teachers found me before class started. I was surprised when she had me follow her into the company class! The intimidation I felt wasn't hidden from my teacher. During the stretches at the end of barre, she encouraged me by saying I was perfectly capable, and this class was not much different than any other class I've taken. I'm glad she was so understanding, and her words comforted me.
I had my confidence back. I also had brand new padding that would cushion the ugly, black nail that had kept me from dancing on pointe until that day. Typical of my life however, those pads made the heel of my shoe slip off after every, single combination. Why is it that I always fall apart at the worst possible times? I was so embarrassed because I was constantly fussing over my shoe.
Despite being nervous and distracted, I think all in all I should be satisfied. My teacher told me I did a good job after class. I'm just relieved I got the first company class over with. I was able to see the hired dancers work, which brought me to the realization that my teacher is right. I am capable of what these dancers are doing. Next time I just need to bring my confidence, and the new heel grippers for my shoes that I bought on Saturday after class.