Dancing with the Corps

 A few weeks ago I wrote about the terror I felt at the thought of going back to company rehearsals, after I was thrown in waltz.  I had almost no clue what I was doing, which was both horrifying and humiliating.  Being sick for a little over a week caused me to miss about five rehearsals.  I was slightly relieved, but at the same time a little concerned about falling behind everyone else.

Last Wednesday and Friday night were the first two rehearsals I was well enough to make it to.  Luckily I was left alone to learn what had gone on without me, and I practiced the steps on the side while taking note of the patterns the dancers formed.  

Yesterday I had a feeling I would be put in for waltz.  My feeling was right.  Of course I was nervous and wanted to tell the director and ballet mistress I'd rather not make a fool of myself again.  And of course I couldn't resort to that.  So I sucked it up and danced anyway.  This time I didn't run in to anyone, and there was no reason for the other dancers to laugh at me.  I actually felt like a corps dancer. Towards the end of the dance I started to have fun, or maybe I was just relieved it was almost over.  I was able to prove to myself that I can handle dancing with the pros.   

I almost missed this valuable opportunity because I started the day with an annoying, persistent cough, but it disappeared in time for ballet.  Next time I'm asked to step in for another dancer in waltz I'll know I can do it